That about sums it up

I have been reading through Daniel as part of M'Cheyne Bible Reading Plan, and was doing some reading in Matthew Henry's Commentary about the prophecies concerning the 70 weeks, and the controversy that surrounds all of it, start dates, stop dates, etc. I came across this quote that I thought quite summed it up. What is amazing is that no matter how much I read on a subject, there is still more to do.

The learned Mr. Poole, in his Latin Synopsis, has a vast and most elaborate collection of what has been said, pro and con, concerning the different beginnings of these weeks, with which the learned may entertain themselves.

Three People

"There are three persons living in each of us: the one we think we are, the one other people think we are, and the one God knows we are."

Leonard Ravenhill Why Revival Tarries

What's on Your Mind?

As I was reading in Life of Christ by Martyn Lloyd-Jones, he made a point about John saying in 1 John that to say anything else besides Jesus Christ was the God-Man who died on the cross and rose from the grave is a lie. John was able to say this because he was there. He saw Jesus on the cross, he saw Thomas reach his fingers into his wounds in the upper room.

This idea really set me off in a good way. The New Testament was written by men who had been there and seen it all. A fact that we obviously all know but doesn't always register. When John wrote his letters to the church in 1,2, and3 John he was so passionate because of the reality that Christ was to him. That is why his words echo with such boldness in 1 John 2:22

"Who is the liar but the one who denies that Jesus is the Christ? This is the antichrist, the one who denies the Father and the Son."

I was there! screams John. I heard him scream "It is Finished!" I watched the skies grow dark and felt the earthquake afterwards. I saw him on the mountaintop conversing with Moses and Elijah. I remember the tension in the air when he called out "Lazarus come forth, and the seconds that seemed like eternity before he did. I remember running all the way to the tomb, looking in, and seeing those folded linens." These memories could be some of the things flashing through his head as he writes. But it doesn't stop with him.

When Paul wrote "I am the chief of all sinners", what images flooded his mind? The men and women and families that he tore apart and carried away to be killed? Stephen gazing into heaven as he stood idly by?

What about Peter as he wrote

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to his great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope the the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead."

or

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety upon Him, because He cares for you.

Could it have been the tender conversation he had with Jesus after denying three times? Could it have been the love and forgiveness in the voice of Christ as he said "Feed My Sheep" Did he remember when the women breathlessly burst into the room and said "He is gone", and then running out the door to see for himself?

More importantly for me I think is this question. What is on my mind as I stand to preach Christ to those before me. "Is my fly zipped? Does my voice sound funny? Will people laugh at that joke? Do they like me? I'm hungry? Another day, another dollar?

Or is the depths of my sin and the heights of his glorious love on my mind? How he pulled me from the miry pit and set my feet on a rock. As a christian and a pastor these things must move to speak. I admit to standing to speak motivated by other things like duty, worry, obligations, and paychecks. I deeply repent of that.

"We cannot stop speaking the things which we have seen and heard" Acts 4:20

I pray that God reminds me of all the things He has done in my life, and that I will be so moved I cannot help but speak of them to all around me.

Bible Giveaway

Logos, maker of the best Bible software available, is now just giving away bibles. They have several great and limited edition bibles they are giving away if you enter the contest. Make sure and go and check it out. See the quote below!



Logos Bible Software is celebrating the launch of their new online Bible by giving away 72 ultra-premium print Bibles at a rate of 12 per month for six months. The Bible giveaway is being held at Bible.Logos.com and you can get up to five different entries each month! After you enter, be sure to check out Logos and see how it can revolutionize your Bible study.

Madoff and Me

I watched with interest yesterday the reaction after the sentencing of Bernard Madoff, the man who bilked people out of billions of dollars in the greatest pyramid scheme in history.

I want to make it clear that I am in no way condoning the acts he committed or anything like that. What a way to start a essay! I heard and saw lots of people condemming him, saying the 150 year sentence he recieved was not enough. Many of the people who fell prey to his theft spoke about their feelings at his conviction. Some of them were personal family friends of the Madoff's and almost all of them lost most if not all of their retirement savings. He is the greatest thief in the history of the world, and he deserved the sentence he got.

My point in all of this is how quick we are to rank peoples sins. Madoff makes me feel better about myself because of how big and awful his sin was. My sins never affect that many people, never cost families their retirement, and never are reported on CNN. However, scripture is clear that all have sinned, that sin is sin, and is an offense to God no matter how great or small.

My sins seem less to me than Madoffs, although I am certain that words I have spoken to people can devestate their life just as badly as losing their retirement could have. My small sins can have just as great as impact. We are all jacked up, however some of us are in ways that everyone can see, like Madoff, or Jon and Kate Gosselin. Most of us are messed up in ways that only the closest to us can see and are impacted by.

I pray for myself that my heart is broken by my sin no matter how great or small, that anything that pushes me away from God hurts me as much as it hurts God. Don't let yourself get caught up in comparing yourself with the public people around you. The only standard we have to live up to is God's.

Inside a Cutter's Mind Review

I just finished the book "Inside A Cutter's Mind" by Jerusha Clark with Dr. Earl Henslin. This book is sub-titled "Understanding and Helping Those Who Self Injure", and I think that pretty much sums up the main ideas of the book.


As someone who works with students and people in all types and walks of life, self injury is something that has come up in counseling and has a all sorts of stereotypes surrounding it, some of which are true, and some of which are false.

This book seeks to take you into the minds of people who do self injure, and strives to give you a glimpse of the choices they make that lead them down this path. It goes into great detail medically speaking, concerning hormones, brain scans and the such. To be honest, I could have done without that part, as I just did not find it all that interesting, but it did lay the foundation for the fact that this is not just a made up problems, and can be a physical as well as a mental issue.


The book also seeks to walk you as a pastor or loved one of a person who self injures through some steps that you can take to help them this situation, and some signs to recognize when you need to hand things off to someone more equipped through education or experience to handle the situation.

I think it is an excellent book, a quick easy read, and should be read by pastors in particular, and is a helpful resource to check back into. It can also be a helpful book for those loved ones of those who self injure, giving them a glimpse into a world they might have trouble understanding. The book is biblically centered and speaks often of Christs redemption on the cross as a necessary help for working through these issues.

Below are few quotes I pulled out.


For many, self-harm acts as the "slap" that distracts them from the overwhelming circumstances and ferocious thoughts and emotions that threaten to spin them completely out of control.

Most self harmers don't want to kill themselves but something in themselves-pain, fear, anger, feelings of worthlessness, and so on.

Psycotherapist Jerilyn Robinson, who works at the S.A.F.E. Alternatives inpatient clinic in Illinois reports that her clients are as likely to have smothering parents as neglectful or abusive ones.

Relationships-not rules-hold lives together.

...childhood trauma is very likely the biggest indicator of future mental illness, even more than being born with two schizophrenic parents.

They exist in the perpetual and unpredictable fear both of being found out and never being found out.



This is a great book. Make sure and pick it up.

True or not?

Well, tell me pastors, teachers, preachers and so on, do you think this is true?

"...as a man goes on preaching this gospel, he finds he has to work more and more. In the early days of Christian ministry I was given sermons, but now I have to work harder, and it is like that in the Christian life." Martyn Lloyd-Jones

This is only part of the quote, but I am not taking it out of context. The idea being that the more you preach and teach, it gets harder instead of easier. That the gospel demands more of you, more of your thoughts, time, efforts and study.

Give me your thoughts!

Organic Fellowship

So it is quite inevitable in the matter of fellowship like this that though in a logical sense we persist in dividing up the aspect of fellowship into the two sides--Godward and manward--they are constantly intermixed and intermingled, because it is a sharing together, it is an intersection of the one upon the other. In other words, fellowship is never mechanical, but always something organic and vital.


Quite the statement, one echoed in many books and blogs today. Except that this was preached by Martyn Lloyd-Jones over 60 years ago. You should read every book you can find by him.

Life in Christ, Martyn Lloyd-Jones

Jesus as a Model of Discipleship

Everyone wants to speak of Jesus as the model of community. He lived and breathed and ate with the disciples. How community must be present in order for true discipleship. Very true. Very convicting.

However, if you keep reading in the gospels, you see that at the end of the 2-3 years, most of the disciples are not what you might be proud of. One denied him three times, to the point of swearing. Another one didn’t believe he rose from the grave, even though he had repeatedly prophesied that he would. Not to mention the one who betrayed him for a few dollars.

But after Jesus left, and the Holy Spirit came, these same men exploded. Why is that? What is the lesson here?


1.Keep Teaching

Even when it seems like they don’t get it, even when you know they don’t get it. Keep teaching.


“Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain to which Jesus had directed them. And when they saw him they worshiped him, but some doubted." (Matthew 28:16-17, ESV)




They saw him at the resurrection. But some doubted. THEY SAW HIM. But still some doubted. Even after Jesus telling them he would rise from the dead. Even after they saw him. They still didn’t get it.

Now, easy for Jesus to do, you might say. He knew the outcome. He knew that Peter would get it eventually. He knew what would happen in the early church. But he also knew that some would never get it. That some would walk away from his feet, because what he taught was a hard teaching. Knew that Judas would betray him. Still he taught, ate with, walked with, lived with them. He called Judas to be a disciple even when he knew what the outcome would be. The fact of the matter is that we don’t know how a person will respond, but we must keep doing what God has called us to do.


2.The choice is theirs not ours

Anyone who has poured out their heart to God in prayer, given everything they had within them to a person, teaching them about God, just to watch them walk away, knows the pain of this reality. I believe pastors feel this pain about every week. Additionally, any parent who has strived so hard to raise their children correctly, in the way that they should go, only to see them follow the desires of the flesh, knows this pain also. I think we can see this pain, hear it in his voice as Jesus interacts with Judas in the last days.

The truth is that there is no magic key, no secret formula, to get someone to follow God. That is not the way God made us. It is a choice. And the choice is all ours.


3.Holy Spirit makes the difference

Before you say “duh”, let’s think this through. We know that the choice still remains to the individual. I believe part of discipleship is presenting a person with the information they need to make the right choice. When I can show a student the reality of God’s greatness, the majesty of His glory, I believe that sticks with them. Even when we think it doesn’t. I’m not saying we remember every word of every sermon we’ve heard, but a part of it sticks with us. Then when the Holy Spirit comes, those things are ignited like kindling. Part of my job as a pastor is not to convince or persuade, but to provide the kindling for the Holy Spirit to ignite. So when we are faced with that choice that we all make, the choice is harder to make.

And not just salvation either. When temptation arises, I desire for them to know the truth about Christ, and about sin. That Christ is the only one who can satisfy. In order to choose temptation, I want them to have to walk past Christ and his truth and beauty. I want to make the choice for them as difficult as I can. I think that is part of what discipleship is. Making the choice more difficult. Not by wise or persuasive words, but by showing them Christ, the majesty and the glory. Not by just telling them how to live the Christian life, but why. Because Christ is worth it.

Life In Christ Lloyd-Jones

"The church has been doing that for many years, she has turned to what has been called the 'social gospel', and we have constantly heard about the social application of the gospel. General statements are made about life, addresses are delivered by archbishops and they are always recorded in the press, but still the situation continues. And according to the Bible, it must continue. What right have we to expect christian behavior from a world that does not believe in Christ. Why should the world apply Christian principles? Does it believe in Christ, does it acknowledge Him to be who He is? Does it accept Him as Savior?

Indeed, I do not hesitate to say that according to the New Testament it is rank heresy to recommend Christian behavior to people who are not Christian. They are incapable of it! Before people can live the Christian life, they must be made a new creation; if they cannot keep the moral law and the Ten Commandments, the ancient law given to the children of Israel, how can they live according to the Sermon on the Mount? How can they follow Christ? It is ridiculous! That is not our message, that is not what the church must say."

Martyn Lloyd-Jones Life in Christ: Studies in 1 John


So, what do you think. If you carry this to it's conclusions, it could call for some very different things that what we have been used to in Evangelicalism. Could this stance be used to advocate not standing against gay marriage, abortion, slavery, murder, public corruption, and on and on?

What Would You Say?

In perusing some old video of an major event I attended, I caught a glimpse of me in the crowd. Young nineteen year old Luke. Skinny Luke. I remember him well. As I was thinking about that, I thought about the path I had taken to get where I am today. And how young me had no idea about the trials he would face. I wondered what I would say to young me, to help set him (me) straight, and avoid some problems. Here is what I came up with.


The road less traveled is less traveled for a reason. It's not a good road.
Not everyone is out to get you.
You really can find satisfaction in God.
Everyone is capable of change, but must people won't.


So what would you tell yourself at nineteen? What lessons do you wish you had learned earlier in life?

The Local Christian Bookstore

This is why I have a hard time shopping there. Taken with my phone, so sorry for the glare.

The Giants Keep Coming

In II Samuel 21, David had to fight against the Phillistine army. Again. The very people that he started out fighting against as a teenager. Goliath was the Philistine champion, remember? Now David has to fight his people again. By this time in his life, David is a much older man. So old that he faints in battle, and his men tell him to not come out with them anymore. Not only is it the Philistines, some of them are the sons of Goliath, now big and bad themselves. Truly the offspring of evil.

Now, I don't want to build a whole theological system off of minor characters, but it only takes quick glance around you to see that evil begets evil. It for sure is true in my own life and struggles One thing leads to another, and on and on. David fought these people, this family, for his whole life. So what does that mean for us?

1. Alot of my struggles through my life will look the same. I struggle with pride, with wanting recognition and fame. I have since elementary. All I ever wanted to be growing up was a rockstar. Instead I became a pastor. My struggles seem the same over the course of my life. It's all the same, only the names have changed, to quote some Bon Jovi theology. David fought these people his whole life, and because of my habits and my nature, and the things that I have allowed into my mind, I struggle with the same things from ten years ago.

2. Knowing is half the battle, according to GI Joe, so I need to be on extra guard to protect those areas in my life where I know I am weak. That is where Satan will hit me. I can say I have never struggled with killing people. Just not my thing. But my pride gets me all the time. Not believing God can satisfy. I know my weaknesses, and must ask God to protect them. Paul talks in II Corinthians 12 about glorying in my weaknesses, and I have to do that, I must let them draw me to God, to pull me close no matter what. I find joy in temptation, for I know God will come through.

3. It would be easy to get down, struggling with the same sin. We are all dragged away and enticed by our own lusts according to James. Mine are different than yours. Now, constantly giving in to the same sin over and over presents a problem, one that must be dealt with through repentance. But I am tempted by the enemy in the same old way all the time. My hope for my life is that I will face temptation, and that I will overcome. Then the temptation will fade, I will be closer to God, and then right when I least expect it, Satan will throw it in my path again. In those areas where I am most vulnerable. Knowing that I am prone to certain struggles, means I must constantly protect myself in those areas, so I do not give in to surprises. I must ask God daily to protect me, to deliver me from evil.

There is only one who can save me.

JJ Heller Give Away

I first came across JJ Heller at grassrootsmusic.com and loved her voice and haunting lyrics. I just found out that she is giving away her next album until the end of October, so make sure and check it out. Here is a video of her in concert, and below is the link to the free CD. Check it out.

Charlie Hall

The Bright Sadness is the latest release from Charlie Hall. Although he doesn't get the pub that the other Sixstep People do, I believe he is the best. The Bright Sadness is such a beautiful term, and it really puts the whole album into persepective, talking about how even though we walk through deep dark places in our life, times of incredible sadness, following God gives us a bright joy that cannot be hidden.

A few of the songs and sample lyrics.

My Brightness
"Yesterday I felt so angry/ and today so insecure/ And I hated that I wrestled/ with the God that I adore."


Hookers and Robbers
“Crack kids, track kids, hookers and robbers, the naked and hungry, Mothers and Fathers
Abuses, excuses, and guns in your hands, and I even welcome the arrogant man!”

"Come break this bread, celebrate the Forgiver. Come as you are!”

Click to watch that one on youtube!

Mystery

Sweet Jesus my sanity
Sweet Jesus my clarity


Make sure and check out the videos for the whole songs, and the cd for the rest. I have listened to Charlie since he played with Nathan Knockels, and I think he is one of the best lyricist out there, always pointing people to Jesus.

The paradox of Youth Workers

We just got back from youth Camp, and we had an awesome time. We took 22 kids and had 4 get saved and 4 rededicate their life.

Working with students is something I love to do, and I have done a little bit of everything in the church. But Youth is different for lots of reasons. As a a Youth Pastor, I am all at one time the students friend, leader, pastor, teacher, and in some ways parent. I have to tell them to take showers at camp. I tell them what to do when we clean up to go home. But at the same time I am their friend, we talk and tell jokes and stories. It is something that doesn't really happen anywhere else in ministry. In pastoring, I was the leader and friend, but I couldn't tell them what to do, or what to wear or say. But with students I have to do all those things at once, and it makes the road tricky. It is not something that people always understand, and typically they think being youth pastor just means being their friends, but it is not that simple.

In the coming days I want to write some more about the challenges of youth ministry.

First Birthday

A late Picture From Easter

Easter
Originally uploaded by laholmes2

Hannah's Birthday is next month and she will be one. She wasn't into the hunting eggs so much as she was into hiding them in her mouth.

Phriday Photos

I don't get a chance to get pictures of a whole lot else, but you can always check out my Flickr

The Dark Cave

I knew that following God would not be easy. I knew that the life he called me to would be difficult. And I have been through enough difficult circumstances to remind me of that should I ever forget. Pastors and Christians who want us to believe that if we follow God it will all work out do us no justice. History is full of millions of people who were probably a lot more devoted to God than I am, who lived miserable hellish lives, and died in torture, mostly for being born in the wrong place at the wrong time. Organizations like Voice of the Martyrs exist to help remind us of that fact.

I knew following God would not be easy. I believe in order to be who God truly desires me to be, I will have to face some difficult circumstances.

But this time is different. When I started on the path that has gotten me to where I am now, I knew it would be difficult. I knew that God would lead me through a dark tunnel, that I would have to trust Him, but in the end He would lead me through to the light on the other side. So I started walking down the dark path with him, looking for the light on the other end of the tunnel. But now I don’t feel like I am in a tunnel. Instead I was lead into a cave by God, and it feels like he has abandoned me here. Now I am surrounded by darkness, and I have hit the back wall, the dead end of the cave, and God and the light are nowhere to be found. I stumble around in darkness so thick I can feel it, and it is closing in and crushing me. I can feel the wall, and I am desperately trying to find the light, to see any small glimpse, some pencil lead sized dot of hope, but instead darkness is every where I turn. This tunnel turned cave mocks my faith, and me, slowly but steadily crushing me in darkness with every passing hour. I have tried shouting Romans 8:28, Jeremiah 33:11, vainly dreaming in my depression induced delirium that they might be some sort of magic phrase, God’s version of open sesame, and that the cave wall would turn into doors, and I would find the light. Instead the words bounce off the indifferent pitiless stonewalls and come back to me, mocking me, that I could ever believe such foolish statements. My fight is gone, my strength and perseverance are gone, and my will to live is going also. I want to believe that God will get me through, I do believe that God will get me through. With every noise and creak and sound, I believe it is the rescue coming. But it never is. “I have never seen the righteous forsaken...” said the psalmist. I hold on to those truths will all I have. Because it is all I have. Still I sit in the dark. Alone. Cold. The paradox of Christian faith has always intrigued me. Death from life. Joy from sorrow. Glory from shame. And now I can feel it. With every passing moment my faith doubts more and more. It seems like God still has not come through. With every passing moment, the odds increase that God will break through, will rescue me, will redeem me. My doubt and my faith both grow stronger as the darkness continues to come.

I know that God will come through. He always does. It is rarely my time or my plan, but God comes through, the walls do disappear and the light at the end of the tunnel reappears. He did it for Job, for David, for Joseph, Jacob, Moses, Gideon, Samson, and on and on and on.

To quote a favorite philosopher, "If we know no dryness, how can we know the rain?" The darkness only makes the light that much brighter.

Phriday Photos

I don't have any new pictures, but here are some old ones


In colorado, I don't really have any idea where



Victoria, BC

Faith and the Reward

Hebrews tells me that “… God is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” (Hebrews 11:6) I have been thinking about this passage lately. Earlier in Hebrews 11 are the verses most of us know pertaining to faith being the evidence of things hoped for. Particularly on my mind is what it means to diligently seek Him. Over the past 6-8 months I have been through some of the hardest difficulties ever in my life. Times that sometimes make me want to walk away from God altogether. And as it stands right now, I see no light at the end of the tunnel. I don’t even see a tunnel. I know God is here, in the midst of my darkness. I know that God works all things together, and that he is here, somewhere. God rewards those who diligently seek Him. To be diligent means you are consistent, steady, or persevering. Every day seeking God, every day looking for Him, calling to Him, listening for Him. In the midst of trials, it is so difficult to do this. Seeking God is easy in good times; I want to hear Him when things are easy. But in a world so dark I can’t see my hand in front of my face, I lose sight of God. I don’t want to listen because I don’t get the answers I want. I don’t want to find Him because I am afraid of what He might tell me. I weary of the Bible because it seems to be full of happy go lucky people who trust God and every thing turns out okay. But look at the end of Hebrews. The whole chapter talks about faith, referencing Noah, Enoch, Abraham, Sara, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, and Moses. Great men and women of God, who saw God do incredible things. Easy for them to trust Him. But as you keep reading, you see that all of these people faced great trials. Overcame great struggles. And if you read the scriptures closely, and not just rely on what you know of the stories, you will see that they all had times when God seemed far away. When God did not seem to answer their prayers. But he came through, and rewarded those who diligently sought Him. Feeling warm and fuzzy yet? Well hold on. Hebrews then goes on to discuss others, saying there is not room for their stories. People like Gideon, Barak, David, Samson, and so on. Listen to these verses.


Hebrews 11:32-35a
And what more shall I say? For time will fail me if I tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets, who by faith conquered kingdoms, performed {acts of} righteousness, obtained promises, shut the mouths of lions, quenched the power of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, from weakness were made strong, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight. Women received {back} their dead by resurrection;




Makes you feel good, doesn’t it? I can overcome kingdoms, escape fire, obtain promises, stop the mouths of lions, or receive the dead back to life. God can do these things through me. He has done it for people in the past. Lets keep reading.

Hebrews 11:35b-39
and others were tortured, not accepting their release, so that they might obtain a better resurrection; and others experienced mockings and scourgings, yes, also chains and imprisonment. They were stoned, they were sawn in two, they were tempted, they were put to death with the sword; they went about in sheepskins, in goatskins, being destitute, afflicted, ill-treated ({men} of whom the world was not worthy), wandering in deserts and mountains and caves and holes in the ground. And all these, having gained approval through their faith, did not receive what was promised,

Woah! Stop the happy train. These people had faith in God, sought Him diligently, and all they got was death, torture, a life of pain and difficulty, and sorrow. It is so important to take all of scripture. I have written before about the importance of studying all of scripture, not just selected verses, and this is a prime example. God rewards those who seek Him. Sometimes in physical ways, always in spiritual ways, and sometimes in ways we cannot understand. Those people who were sawn in half and lit on fire might have had trouble seeing God in their life, but no matter how difficult my circumstances get, I have to trust Him, to stay close to Him. To listen to what He says. No matter how difficult, I must believe that God’s plan for me is perfect. Even in the midst of death and sorrow, I know He will come through in the end. Diligently, consistently, steadily, every day looking for Him, seeking Him. And that is faith. Seeking God in the midst of sorrow, even when seeking God got you the sorrow in the first place.

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Phriday Photos

Some Late Halloween Pics

Phriday Photos

Check out the bigger image at my Flickr